As a mom to a daughter with ADHD, I understand how confusing it can be to figure out whether your child’s quirks are just part of growing up or something that needs more attention. I’ve been there myself, questioning my own experiences before I was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult. Watching my daughter, I would often catch myself asking the same questions: Is this just normal kid behaviour? Or is it something more?
Trust me, if you’re struggling with this, you’re not alone. It’s hard to know where that line is, especially when kids are naturally full of energy and impulsive at times. But I’ve come to realise that while all kids may be forgetful, distracted, impulsive or a little hyper sometimes, ADHD takes these behaviours to a whole new level. Let’s break it down.
Understanding ADHD Symptoms in Children
I wasn’t diagnosed with ADHD until adulthood, but looking back, I can see the signs were always there. I had already developed ways to manage my symptoms by the time I figured out what was going on with me. With my daughter, however, the signs were obvious from the start. The constant need to move, difficulty sitting still, blurting out thoughts before thinking, often sensitive and upset—they weren’t just “phases” or “typical toddler behaviour,” they were the telltale signs of ADHD.
But even knowing what I know now, I still found myself second-guessing. Was I overreacting? Were these just normal kid things? It’s easy to doubt yourself as a parent. After all, every child can be full of energy or distracted at times, right? So how do we know when it crosses that invisible line into ADHD?
ADHD vs Normal Behaviour: How to Tell the Difference
Here’s where it gets tricky. All kids can be a little inattentive, hyperactive, or impulsive as part of growing up. But when does it go from being a “quirk” to something that needs professional help? In my daughter’s case, it was the consistency and intensity of the behaviours that made it clear something more was happening.
For example, most kids have trouble sitting still on long car rides—who wouldn’t? But for some children with ADHD, even sitting down for short periods can feel like an impossible task. While other kids might eventually settle down, their restlessness often persists through most activities. It’s not just a passing phase; it starts affecting their ability to function in school, at home, and socially, creating challenges that go beyond what’s typical for their age.
Recognising ADHD Behaviours in Children: Key Differences
If you’re wondering whether your child’s behaviour might be more than just typical childhood mischief, look for patterns in three key areas: intensity, frequency, and duration.
With ADHD, these behaviours tend to be stronger, more persistent, and happen in multiple settings. For example, if meltdowns are not occasional—they are frequent and long-lasting. No matter what you try, your child may struggle to calm down, and it would sometimes take hours for them to settle.
The second major difference is the impact on daily life. While all kids might lose focus now and then or forget to do something, for children with ADHD, these challenges interfere with their ability to learn, play, and interact with others. For some children with ADHD, struggles with focus and impulsivity make it difficult to sit through activities like a music lesson, and impulsivity can impact their friendships, often leading to frustration for both the child and those around them.
Cultural Differences in Perception of ADHD
The way ADHD symptoms are recognised and addressed can vary greatly across cultures. In some countries, behaviours like hyperactivity or impulsivity might be seen as a lack of discipline or even creativity, while in others, they are quickly identified as symptoms of ADHD. For instance, in the United States, ADHD is one of the most commonly diagnosed neurodevelopmental conditions in children, with prevalence rates around 9-10%. However, in countries like Finland, the rate is significantly lower, closer to 1%. This disparity may stem from cultural attitudes toward behaviour, parenting styles, and access to mental health resources. In some Asian cultures, symptoms like inattentiveness may be underreported or viewed as a normal part of childhood development, which can delay diagnosis and support. Understanding these cultural nuances is crucial for parents navigating the ADHD landscape in different parts of the world.
When to Seek Professional Help for ADHD in Children
If your child’s behaviours seem more intense or frequent than their peers’ and are affecting their day-to-day life, it’s important seeking professional guidance. Start talking to your paediatrician, who can refer you to a specialist for a thorough assesment.
The process involves interviews, behaviour assessments, and possibly some cognitive testing. It’s detailed and, honestly, a bit overwhelming at times. ADHD often occurs alongside other conditions like anxiety or learning difficulties, so getting a proper diagnosis is crucial for figuring out the best way forward.
For my daughter, the diagnosis wasn’t just ADHD—it also revealed sensory processing challenges we hadn’t fully recognised. Armed with this information, we could put together a more tailored plan, including therapy and educational support, to meet her unique needs.
Supporting a Child with ADHD: Practical Tips for Parents
Once you understand what’s going on, the real work begins. As a parent, your role in supporting your child is huge—but it’s also full of ups and downs. I’ll be the first to admit that some days are tough. There have been times when I’ve doubted myself or felt completely overwhelmed by the challenges. But over the years, I’ve learned strategies that really help.
Routine is key for us. Having a consistent structure that breaks tasks into smaller, manageable steps helps my daughter stay on track. Finding creative ways to use her boundless energy—whether it’s through music, dance, trampolining, or hands-on learning—has been incredibly beneficial.
But the biggest lesson I’ve learned is this: ADHD isn’t a flaw or a failure. It’s simply a different way of thinking and experiencing the world. With the right tools, understanding, and patience, your child can thrive. I’ve seen my daughter’s strengths emerge in ways I never expected. She’s incredibly creative, resilient, and brings a passion to everything she does that is truly inspiring.
Read more: Sensory Processing and ADHD: A Parent’s Guide to Understanding and Supporting Your Child
Parenting a Child with ADHD: You’re Not Alone
If you’re reading this and feeling overwhelmed by the journey ahead, know that you’re not alone. Trust your instincts as a parent and don’t be afraid to reach out for support. ADHD can be tough, but it’s also an opportunity to learn more about your child’s unique abilities and strengths.
Whether it’s finding the right support at school, working with therapists, or simply learning to navigate each day with a little more patience and flexibility, there’s a lot of hope on the horizon. Together, we can ensure that every child with ADHD has the chance to reach their full potential.
So, take a deep breath, trust yourself, and keep moving forward. You’ve got this.